Over the past couple of years while our country has slipped deeper and deeper into economic turmoil, I have at least been able to take comfort and lean on the fact that no matter how bad it gets, our country, including the town in which I live, will always need teachers. Still true, but...well...apparently just not as many.
No, this blog post isn't about me losing my job. The good thing about working for a school district for 8 years is that it puts you far enough up the ladder so that you don't get cut during a 'reduction in force'. I have learned that it does not, however, save you from the
effects of a 'reduction in force'.
Fast-forward to last Friday, May 22nd. That was the day that we all knew that the specifics of the much anticipated budget cuts would be announced. In other words, we would know what positions, what programs, and sadly what people were slated to be cut. My stomach was in knots all week long. In knots because I feared for some of my friends and co-workers. Never once (until Friday) did I consider the possibility that my own position was in jeopardy. I guess 7 years at a school in the same position can give you a false sense of security. And did.
So you know where this is going. At the end of the day on Friday I walked into a meeting with 4 of my colleagues. When I saw that there were only 4 of us, I knew what was up. I knew that I wasn't just shifting grade levels. I was being transferred to a different school. Not quite how I thought my Friday was going to go.
That was a tough day. At first I was in shock, almost numb to any emotion...although it was impossible not to cry some when my friends, the people I've worked with for the last 7 years, rallied around me. We all stood there in the hall together. In shock. That night the shock gave way to sadness, as the realization began to sink in. The realization that I am leaving the people who have been like my second family all these years. They're not just people I work with, they're my friends. Good friends. The people who were with me during 2 pregnancies, 2 births, and those ever so fun, ever so challenging early childhood years. They were there when Grayson was born, and they've been there this year as I've gushed with pride over my now school-aged boy. Therein lies my reason to be sad. Your friends are (or should be) people who you enjoy seeing and spending time with. And leaving Newby just means that I will see those friends much less.
But now that I've had a couple of days to think and process, I'm also a little excited. This coming from a person who typically does not like change. But I know too much now. 7 years ago I might have thought (and did think) that it was the end of the world to be involuntarily transferred. But really, as I later found out, it was just God's plan unfolding. What felt horribly wrong at first turned out to be incredibly right. Meeting a new friend--one of my best--and falling into the most ideal job share/childcare trade arrangement that was the envy of many, MANY throughout the district...I was blessed beyond what I ever could have imagined.
But I also know that's how God's plans work. You don't always see the good in them until much later in the journey. And that makes me think about the person who I am replacing. Because I am replacing someone. A first year teacher. A really, really GOOD first year teacher. And I remember that year all too well. When you get your first job at your first school, you can't help but think that's where your teaching career is going to play out. That your first classroom is going to be your only classroom. (Sounds silly to say that now that I'm 11 years into my "career", but I remember thinking that when I got my first job. I guess that's why I was SO devastated when I got a pink slip 2 years later. Sigh.) So that part will never feel good.
But other parts I'm really looking forward to! If you know me well at all, then you know that I LOVE getting my classroom ready at the beginning of each school-year. In fact, it almost (in a sick kind of way) pains me to see my students actually touch and use things on the first day! Ha! Ha! All of that is just to say that it will be fun to set up a new space. And get to know a new administrator. And hopefully make new friends and be inspired by their teaching. It can't be so bad, right?
I know though, too, that there are tough days up ahead. And stressful days. The end of the school-year is busy enough, but to add sorting, packing, and moving on top of that? Ugh. And no matter how okay I
think I am with all of this, emotions will surface over the next 3 weeks when I'm at school and in the environment that I'll be leaving, with the people who I like and admire so much. But thru it all I just have to remember that some day, at some point in my journey that is life, I'm going to look back and see that there was a reason for May 22nd. A good reason.
